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Un-Sincerely Yours - Page One
August 2002

In Which Dwanollah Finds Herself Having to Write a Some Really Pissy Letters to Assorted Assholes, Dinks and Incompetents. (Only names, salutations and closings have been changed.)


Dear Parking Enforcement Butt-heads:

On Sunday, my husband and I returned home from dinner to discover a car had parked in front of our driveway, blocking our access. We were mildly annoyed by the inconvenience, and I called the Wilshire District department of the LAPD to report the car. A dispatcher told me that someone would be sent to ticket and tow the vehicle so we could park our car in our driveway. It was about 8:30 PM when I called; within the next hour, I saw a police car drive by a few times and stop, and I assumed that the car had been ticketed, but when I checked, there was no citation on the car. I had hoped the vehicle would be removed so that I could re-park our own car in our driveway that night, but sometime after 10:30 PM, the owner left. I had already gone to bed; I teach a morning class and had to be on campus at 7:30 the following morning.

At ten minutes after midnight, we were awakened by the phone ringing. A parking enforcement officer was downstairs and had finally come to check out the situation. At midnight. He insisted we come downstairs in order to confirm his observation of "So, it looks like the car's gone now, right?"

I am astounded at the complete lack of professionalism and intelligence in the way this matter was handled. First of all, I realize an illegally parked vehicle isn't an emergency, but to wait four hours before arriving…? Moreover, why would someone reason it appropriate and necessary that, despite seeing that 1) the car was gone and 2) all lights in the house were out and the occupants were most likely asleep, he should call and wake us up to inquire about the obvious?

I contacted the LAPD on this matter expecting the situation to be handled with some level of aptitude and proficiency. Instead, we witnessed an astoundingly lackadaisical attitude and complete lack of common sense. I am disgusted and disappointed in the organization that is supposed to be considered "LA's finest." Next time, I'll know to call a tow truck myself rather than deal with the senselessness of LAPD.

Most Annoyed, and With Only 4 Hours of Sleep to Boot, You Stupids,



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